BASED ON THOSE DELIGHTFUL INSPIRATIONAL POSTERS
WHICH HAVE BECOME A FIXTURE OF DENTIST'S OFFICES EVERYWHERE.
 
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PAGE ONE OF FOUR

 
CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK
I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the
sound of how awesome I am.

(LINE LIFTED FOM HERE)
 
BEN TOR KATRA
You don't mind, do you?
I'm kind of in a hurry.
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CHEKOV
In space, everyone can hear you scream.
 
CONTINUITY
We're going to pretend this never happened.
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EXPENDABILITY
Kirk, Spock, McCoy, and Ensign Ricky are beaming down to the planet. Guess who's not coming back.
(LINE LIFTED FOM HERE)
 
LOGIC
Not as prevalent as you wish it were.
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NOMAD
See the Universe, meet interesting people, and kill them.
 
RACISM
To be fair, he was green-blooded,
and he did have pointy ears.
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SEXUAL TENSION
What, you don't see it?
 
THE ORACLE
Oracle's Message of the Day #1: Potatoes make you stupid. Stupid enough to believe the Oracle. Eat the potatoes.
(LINE LIFTED FOM HERE)
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SPOCK'S BRAIN
Look, not every episode can be "City on the Edge of Forever," okay?
 
TANTALUS
You don't have to be crazy to work here, but it helps.
(LINE LIFTED FOM HERE)
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TECHNOFEAR
If you're afraid of the transporter...
If you have nothing but contempt for computers...
Maybe outer space isn't for you, dude.
 
TRUE LOVE
Don't worry, they'll find a way to dispose of her by the end of the episode.
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VULCANS
So brilliant. So logical. So pointy.
 
INGENUITY
Yes, it is perfectly reasonable that Kirk had the know-how to make the gunpowder and put together the bazooka to defeat the Gorn. That's why he's the goddamn Captain.
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Site launched 26 July 2006
Site last updated 30 August 2006